Fond memories, a sweet treat and a scary trip.

When you don't blog for awhile, you have a lot to catch up on. I've had things I've wanted to say, but time, as always, got away from me.

First, let me start out by saying I'm very happy and content in my life right now. I really have everything I ever dreamed of having and it's better than I thought it would be. That being said, I was a bit nostalgic on Thursday evening. I met Nic downtown for his kickball game. It was almost hard driving to the East Side, that Nic and I called home for some time, there was just so much to look at: what has changed, what staid the same, where did things go?! I sat on the sidelines during the game and took in all the sights, sounds and smells of my beloved East Side of Milwaukee. I make us sound like we moved to the most rural part of Wisconsin, but there really is an entirely different feel for life down there. It made me think fondly of all the nights Nic and I would just walk down the street after work and grab a drink and dinner. On Sunday's we'd walk to St. Hedwig for mass and then stop at Starbucks and read our paper. We'd go to fun bars and clubs on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday nights. I loved it down there. As I drove home, I almost started feeling sad. I missed the dumbest things. Our grocery store, our favorite bar, our church, our freedom. Nic, we are moving back to the city! Then I walked in our door. I love our home. It is Nic and I through and through. We have spent a lot of time making the house a home. We have a magnificent backyard and Emma (and next summer Osita) can play in freely. We have neighbors with a TV in their garage for all the greatest sports events! I couldn't choose one thing that I would great rid of, just to move back downtown. Nic and I had some great times in the past, but I wake up every morning with anticipation of what life will hand to us next. Downtown is a great place to visit, it's like revisiting the past. But I look at life around me and can't wait for what the future holds.

Then...Just as I was thinking about my great Thursday night and how everything just falls into place, on Friday morning I did something I haven't done in almost 6 months. I had Starbucks. Yes this is a noteworthy experience. It was a decaf, non-fat, pumpkin spice mocha and it was wonderful. I guess I just never really saw the point on going to Starbucks to get decaf coffee. It brought back so many memories too, because the last time I walked through those doors, I was studying for my PHR. As I sat in my car, sipping my pumpkin spice mocha, I couldn't help smile. Mmmm, maybe next time I go, I can have the caffeinated beverage (watch out world!)

Saturday morning I woke up and life decided to hand us our next challenge. Some of you know that on Tuesday of this week, I was spotting a little bit. Saturday morning I woke up with excitement, I was going to spend the day at the spa with my mom and sister (an annual tradition). Well, I started spotting again. Although it was never a ton of blood, enough was enough. I couldn't ignore two occurrences in one week. I sat there for a second not even sure what to do. Who could I even call? I have a great support system, but I didn't want any of them to be as worried as Nic and I. So I finally just called the 24 hour nurse line, surprisingly calm through it all. She told me Dr. Windser was the OBGYN on call that weekend, she would explain my situation and give me a call back. I just sat at the kitchen table trying to wrap my arms around this, Nic fidgeted. I've never seen someone clean a kitchen so fast and so well in all my life. The nurse called back and said she wanted us to go to St. Mary's, in Milwaukee. But I'm delivering at Ozaukee, I said. Milwuakee is better equipped to handle an emergency and they had the better NICU. I hung up the phone, went to Nic's arms and just started sobbing. The ride to the hospital was long. Once we got there, the first thing they did was check Osita's heartbeat. They found it within seconds. The nurse looked up at my and smiled, This is a great thing, she said. Again, I just started sobbing. Whatever caused this blood had not effected our magnificent little girl. She was OK. We could even hear her moving. I got changed and hooked up to the heartbeat monitor and a contractions monitor. After two hours and several tests, the resident came in and said everything looked great. Osita sounded healthy and happy and all of the tests came back normal. She said in late pregnancy your internal skin is getting so tight and so stretched that sometimes, it can just crack and cut. They weren't sure, but they knew the blood hadn't come from a lifeline of the baby (I'm trying to not provide to many details to gross anyone out) and that was the most important thing. We left. Nic was much more calm and confident than on the drive down there. I wasn't so sure. I still feel incredibly cautious and concerned. To be honest, I just want to sit for the next three months, and do nothing, so as not to hurt her and have everything turn out OK. So this is parenting...the desire to do anything to protect and save your children, but the reality of knowing that life will happen and all we can do is try our best and the rest is out of our hands.

And now it's Sunday. I'm looking forward to a relaxing day. To put some normalcy back into my life and go back to that feeling of trust that life is great and everything will be OK.

Wait - What?

When I was engaged I lurked on this little website called "The Knot.com". Now that I am PG, I get to lurk on a website call "Thebump.com". For those of you that don't know, it's a website filled with a bunch of PG women talking about their pregnancy. For those of you that do know...once you are done laughing, then keep reading!

So anyway, I was eating lunch today, lurking, because I never really post and was reading about all these girls taking their 1 HR GT today - or 1 hour Glucose Test. I get to take my test on Tuesday. I'll have my test at 27 weeks, along with my final round (hopefully) of blood work. Between the GT and the blood work, they are basically testing for gestational diabetes and preeclampsia.

I never thought twice about this test! My doctor told me to come in about 1/2 hour early for my appointment, I'd drink something really sugary that tastes like McDonald's Orange Drink and then go do my regular routine. Why is everyone on TheBump freaking out about their tests? Is it really bad? One girl said, "It doesn't taste that bad." Others were saying things like GL (Good Luck). What?! Good Luck for what?

I'm going to try and forget about it. This is one of those times that ignorance is bliss. I'm 26 weeks PG, feeling GREAT and have NO idea what lies ahead of me. Cheers! ::raising glass of what I think will taste like McDonald's Orange Drink::

I feel distracted!

This weekend, Nicolas and I registered. You would think I would be sighing a big ol' sigh of relief! 'Tis not the case! Did I register for enough? Did I register for all the right stuff? What if we don't get everything we registered for? It's not like our wedding where we can just live without it (do I really NEED a pink Kitchen Aid?). I mean - don't you think I NEED a diaper genie? I didn't register for clothes - do people really just buy you clothes? Registering for a baby is really SO much more difficult then registering for a wedding.

Then there is the entire concept of our changing family. Nic and I got to date for awhile, then - live in sin - then get engaged, then be married. We planned for this. With a baby, it's just a bunch of planning, but where's the baby? I think now, more than ever, after registering, I want to see her. I want to hold her. I want to kiss her. I can't wait to meet her. This little thing that preoccupies 90% of my thoughts, especially today! Last night I sat in the nursery and tried to picture it all and it's so fustrating to think I still have to wait 3 more months!

I am enjoying this. I am enjoying every minute of being pregnant; I think I just finally hit that nesting stage. I want to sit at home and do nothing but prepare my house for our daughter. Until then...I guess I better get back to work. Maybe my 12:30 interview will just want to talk about my pregnancy...

A little shadow to the day

So, there are other things in this world besides my pregnancy. Hard to believe from reading this blog, I know!

However, didn't you feel, or see, the little shadow that hung over yesterday? Today? I can't help myself from thinking back 7 years ago...What was I doing when I heard about the attacks on the World Trade Center? The Pentagon? Pennsylvania? It didn't over take my day, but sometimes would pop into my head out of no where. September 11 used to just be a day. Nothing. How can you see the day on the calendar and not remember what that day was like 7 years ago? How can you just let the day pass without at least one thought of what happened. A moment to remember all those that lost their lives or that lost a love one. It makes me want to watch Rain On Me (or whatever that movie was called with Adam Sandler) and cry and cry and cry. If I sit still long enough I can almost feel that fear, sadness and anger again. I can remember calling my mom days later telling her that I was still having nightmares about the event.

I remember waking up the next morning. The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, the towers still smoldering...but we were all going on. We all go on.

Perhaps September 11th makes me feel more patriotic than the 4th of July. So for one moment, I want us all to sit still and think about that day, feel the emotions of it and remember how proud we were to be American that day and how, even if for a moment, we remember those emotions every day.

An added feature...

...Look what I did today at lunch! A nice little countdown to always remind myself...and my 100s and 1000s of faithful blog followers...just how pregnant I am! (Side note...I used the new due date of 12/26).

I was conducting an orientation at work the other day and I paused over the policy that mentioned our Internet "can and will be monitored" and something about not using work Internet for blogging. BUT, I'm pretty sure my new little hobby won't get me into any problems at work. I love to bring my lunch to work - it's cheaper and healthier (usually) - but I hate it because then I don't leave my desk all day. So I really try to take at least 30 minutes to eat my lunch and do something mindless before I have to put my HR hat back on and fight the fires of, well, of that company I work for ;)

This morning I was feeling very sad, Osita has been so quiet for almost 24 hours. She's really catching up on her Zzzz; I really feel so much better when she is doing gymnastics. Well, after some spicy sloppy joes for lunch, she's back to practicing cartwheels, flips and kicks. Or maybe she has the hiccups? Which I love too! I'm feeling much happier this afternoon. Maybe I should celebrate - they have those pickle flavored potato chips in the vending machine that I love oh so much! Nah, I better not...just last night I was crying to Nic that I have nothing to wear to my high school reunion because I feel very fat these days. And to think I gave up hot fudge sundaes. I'm gaining weight and probably will feel fat regardless - I am 25 weeks pregnant. Maybe I should eat the hot fudge sundae - with the pickle chips!

Enjoy the ticker/countdown :)

Parenting can't be that hard!

At our last appointment, Dr. Coulter recommended that we sign up for our "birthing class". This is where we will tour the Columbia Center (aka St. Mary's Ozaukee), see the rooms, etc. I thought it was odd she was so surprised we hadn't signed up yet. The baby is still 3 months away! So, I called Columbia and signed up for the class. Wait, let me rephrase that...I signed up for all 6 classes - 2.5 hours each. It can't just be birthing classes - We must have signed up for the parenting class too! And really - after 6 classes, we have to be experts - right?!

Fast forward to yesterday, Saturday. I'm sitting at my sister-in-law's house, talking, watching her drink wine and being jealous, when I casually mention, "Did you and Tim take Parenting Classes". "No" was her response and her puzzled face that followed made me explain the classes that we were taking. "Dana, those aren't parenting classes...those are childbirthing classes." What?! 6 classes to explain the childbirth process?! I thought we would be over educated on parenting, spend a class on the childbirth process and now I find out it's going to take over 12 hours to explain how little Osito gets welcomed to the world! "Maybe I want to be naive!" was my response...then, she started asking me questions. Questions that I would apparently learn the answer to in these classes. Oh boy.

I went into this weekend thinking how easy parenting could be. We would have 12 hours filled of advice and time spent with other parents. I leave the weekend knowing that it takes 6 classes to explain just the first day of parenting! And suddenly, I have a new perspective on this little belly I am growing. A new perspective...and let's be honest...a lot of fear! If it takes 12 hours to explain delivery, how long would a parenting class take?! I don't think I'm ready for that answer - sometimes...ignorance is bliss!

Wow - I feel GREAT!

Nic and I had a doctor's appointment today. It just was a great appointment! First of all, a little PSA about my OB-GYN. I LOVE her. She is my polar opposite - so calm, collected, educated on child birthing and experienced at parenting! She is a joy to talk to. If you happen to get pregnant or are just looking for a good Gyno (hey, aren't we all?!) go to Advanced Healthcare, er, I mean, Aurora and ask for Dr. Rene Coulter!

Anywho, we talked about the ultrasound. She said everything looks great! She went over what they all saw and measured. The baby weighed in at 14 oz and 14 cm. The placenta and uterus all look great. At this point, the baby is breached (but down for those that don't know), but as Dr. Coulter said, with as much room as the baby still has to move and how active she is, it probably changed before we left the ultrasound. She said it's nothing to worry about now. We heard the heart beat again - 144 - and my belly is measuring at 23.5 cm. TECHNICALLY, my due date has changed to 12/26; I'm measuring at 23.5 weeks (yes, there should be a numerical correlation there). However, just as Dr. Coulter said, a day or two doesn't really make a big difference. It's still a Christmas baby and she'll come when she wants.

I'm just SO happy that the appointment went so well today...but now the bad news...I gained 12 pounds in 4 weeks! Oh, that can't be good! I guess I better start watching what I eat a little bit. No more hot fudge sundaes - well, maybe just not every night! :)